I think there is a myth that men aren't doing the same thing, "Specifically, about how women are trained to ignore their inner voice. To defer. To discount. To make sure everyone else is comfortable before attending to what their own judgment is telling them." Men are just rewarded more from the system for ignoring their inner voice. There's a need to get more inner voices in all of the rooms. I think women have a head start in exercising their inner voice. The inner voice will be more critical to help us reground ourselves in the culture of care you are describing.
I love this description of agency. "Real agency requires having the ability to act on the world around you and the wisdom to do so according to your values. It means knowing yourself well enough to distinguish your actual values from your initial reaction, your considered judgments from your defensive ones. It requires sitting with the uncomfortable question of why you believe what you believe and whether it holds up to scrutiny. It requires aligning your actions with your principles."
This has been my process as I'm learning to be more true to my own inner voice.
It would be really valuable to hear from men (since the essay and the podcast were female-only perspectives) on how they are trained to ignore their intuition as well and the impact that has on them. That is a missing perspective in the conversation that’s incredibly important.
I find the Ignatian practice of examen to be very helpful in cultivating the sort of self-knowledge that supports aligning one’s actions with values. Looking back on the day and asking, “Where was I drawing closer to God? (Aligning with my values.) Where was I moving further from God? (Misaligned with my values) How might I do better tomorrow?” The practice of examining actions and motives, then setting intentions for aligning action and values is a gentle corrective to the drift, or the sometimes jarring swerve, away from my core understanding of what constitutes goodness. Of course, I also pray to God to help me fulfill my intentions.
I think there is a myth that men aren't doing the same thing, "Specifically, about how women are trained to ignore their inner voice. To defer. To discount. To make sure everyone else is comfortable before attending to what their own judgment is telling them." Men are just rewarded more from the system for ignoring their inner voice. There's a need to get more inner voices in all of the rooms. I think women have a head start in exercising their inner voice. The inner voice will be more critical to help us reground ourselves in the culture of care you are describing.
I love this description of agency. "Real agency requires having the ability to act on the world around you and the wisdom to do so according to your values. It means knowing yourself well enough to distinguish your actual values from your initial reaction, your considered judgments from your defensive ones. It requires sitting with the uncomfortable question of why you believe what you believe and whether it holds up to scrutiny. It requires aligning your actions with your principles."
This has been my process as I'm learning to be more true to my own inner voice.
It would be really valuable to hear from men (since the essay and the podcast were female-only perspectives) on how they are trained to ignore their intuition as well and the impact that has on them. That is a missing perspective in the conversation that’s incredibly important.
I find the Ignatian practice of examen to be very helpful in cultivating the sort of self-knowledge that supports aligning one’s actions with values. Looking back on the day and asking, “Where was I drawing closer to God? (Aligning with my values.) Where was I moving further from God? (Misaligned with my values) How might I do better tomorrow?” The practice of examining actions and motives, then setting intentions for aligning action and values is a gentle corrective to the drift, or the sometimes jarring swerve, away from my core understanding of what constitutes goodness. Of course, I also pray to God to help me fulfill my intentions.
I wasn’t familiar with the practice of examen — thank you for sharing it!
It seems very important to combine self connection with an external reference point to avoid being self indulgent or self serving.